Nudged: Wear different fabrics

I came up with this Nudge while brainstorming ways to treat all my senses, in this case touch through textures. But now that I look at it, I see a great opportunity to weed out clothing from my closet and dresser that doesn’t make me feel—as in emotionally feel—good. Let the decluttering begin!

What Happened: Kicked off the week in super-soft, stretchy, and flattering jeans with one of my favorite ribbed cotton turtlenecks. At first glance in the full-length mirror, I felt pulled together and ready to face any challenge the day had in store for me. As the day progressed, I made a point of noticing how the fabrics felt on me and landed on “cozy,” but not entirely in a good way. The sweater has become nubby, with a collar that is droopy and floppy. The once-bright and warm coral color has faded, and it looks more worn-out than boho trendy. As I removed it, I thought for half a minute about adding it to my drawer of activewear, as a layering piece for dog walks and bike rides on chilly days. I don’t want to waste it! But this shirt has clothed me for over 20 years—for real—and it showed. I put it in the recycling bin. And then I waffled and paced, and almost pulled it out a couple of times. Finally, I left it in the bin, saying to myself “I deserve better.”

That night I slipped into my favorite cotton PJs and immediately noticed how much better they felt against my skin last week after I took time to iron them. It helped my mood that I then crawled into luxurious flannel sheets—something I splurged on as a gift for Thor (wink wink)—that I LOVE.

The rest of the week involved more noticing, from the workout shirt that was super-itchy (just a nettle that was easily removed), to the gorgeous linen blazer that still feels stiff (no more suffering for fashion!), to the soft-like-baby-clothes sweatpants that feel like a warm hug. I was aware of the textures that pleased or irritated my skin, as well which items made me feel like a slob or a semi-retired supermodel.

After putting on that blazer for a meeting on Zoom (and rejecting it when I sensed I’d be squirming on camera), I took a fresh, hard look at my closet. I have a lot of clothes I’m not wearing. And not just because of COVID and working from home and being lazy. I read somewhere recently that I should only display in my closet those favorite items I always want to wear, so that when I go to pull an outfit, everything works. So, after my meeting, I set a timer for one hour and pulled out all of my shirts.  

I had only one criteria: Would I feel good about myself if I walked out the door wearing this right now? I made quick work of delegating shirts to recycle, donate, and keep piles, then moved onto dresses, pants, sweaters, and blazers.

There were several items I love that were just snug enough to be uncomfortable. Stay or go? I asked myself my criteria question, and out they came. I don’t want to be in a flurry of trying to get ready to go somewhere and have my self-confidence take a hit. But I did put a few special items into a bag I marked “See me when you lose 15 lbs.” My plan is to try these things again in six months, and if I don’t feel good, I’ll add them to the donation bag.

The Ah-Hahs: This was fun, and I am encouraged knowing whenever I open my closet, I will know that I can pull together an outfit that makes me feel and look good. As a bonus, I have some newly open space at the front of the closet, so I moved something up: my hiking boots. Seeing them regularly and being motivated to wear them again will make me feel great.

A note on body positivity: Several weeks ago I shared I had rediscovered a 21-year-old journal. I’ve been reading through those pages, remembering that woman who was struggling and had no idea of what was to come in life—mostly good stuff!

In one passage, she bemoaned the fact that she’d put on a couple of pounds and needed to get back into the gym asap. My first thought, as I laughed out loud, was “Bless your sweet heart! You have no idea what the scale will show you in your 50s!” I wish I could get back to that weight. I wish I faced the challenge of needing to lose just a few pounds.

But I stopped myself from going into blame and shame, and I sent her some love, because she was perfect then, and I’m perfect now. Maybe not in an airbrushed-swimsuit model-covergirl way, but we all know that’s not real or even desirable. Right? So part of this Nudge reminds me to love my body as I am right now. And I plan on dressing it to look and feel its best right now.

I hope you’re inspired to do the same for yourself.