Nudged: No complaining
Oh, for pete’s sake. “No complaining”–for a whole week?! This is going to be such a…
See what I just did? š
There is so much negativity in our world right now, and I’d like to limit what I contribute. I know from experience my spirits are lifted when I’m around someone who has a positive outlook and attitude, and I’d like to be that good-hearted soul more often. So, from now–this moment–until end of the week (and onward, I hope), I’m all about good vibes.
What Happened: It’s interesting how we use complaining as a crutch for connecting with other people. My friend might say to me, “My schedule is so overwhelming! I can’t keep up!” and I–trying to commiserate (isn’t that a depressing sounding word?) and be supportive–reply, “I know! Me, too! I want to clone myself, and even then, I’ll never get everything done!” Sound familiar?
Throughout this week, I caught myself wanting to fall into this pattern on phone calls, in text messages, in emails. Taking a breath, I then made a conscious effort to shift the tone with something like, “Gosh, aren’t we lucky to have so many great clients/projects/loved ones who want to be with us?” And every time, we took our conversations in a new–and happier–direction.
What a fun Nudge!
The Ah-Hahs: It wasn’t just in my interactions with friends that I noticed this trend. Several times I caught myself thinking negatively. This Nudge really helped me pay attention to that ol’ stinking thinking and turn it around.
And, let’s be clear: This Nudge experiment didn’t soften the blows from the daily news. The horror stories keep coming. What’s different are my choices for how I react. I’ve talked to some friends who have taken news and social media breaks–for their own mental health. I get it–and I support them in their choices. I, however, needed to keep watching, to bear witness and support friends who are most impacted by current world events.
This also isn’t about acting “as if,” which feels forced and inauthentic. Instead, what I chose to do, again and again, was lead myself back to the most powerful of all internal actions: GRATITUDE. What a gift.