52+: “I’m not down with that”
Dear Nudgers, With any nudge, I encourage you to “make it your own.” Last winter, when I invited Barbara Irwin Gildea to write a guest post, she took this directive and ran with it! Instead of working a single nudge through one week, she applied it over several weeks, to different areas of her life. I invite you to read Barbara’s account and hope it inspires you. — Kathleen
When Kathy asked me to write on her 52Nudges blog, I responded with an emphatic YES! So emphatic that I thought I would wear out the exclamation mark key! Then I wondered what in the world did I have to offer?
As the days passed, the phrase “I’m not down with that” kept rattling in my head, along with the fact that I’d not done much to correct any of those situations in which I’d found myself. So, I was NUDGED.
As the new year was approaching, I realized much of my time would be filled with committee meetings. With the nudge in mind, I finally sent a long-overdue email to the leaders of one committee I’ve been a member of for many years, telling them “I am not down with the way I’ve been treated.” Without going down the rabbit hole of explanations, I simply said they were reminding me of the boys who had made my son so uncomfortable in 5th grade that he switched schools. I also said I was not leaving the committee, because my work with them is one of my missions. It is a work-in-progress, and I am hopeful.
Meanwhile, I had been researching my father’s military career, as I had always wanted him to be recognized for what he did during the Vietnam War, in particular his part in Operation Blue Light in 1965. My Dad’s leadership as commander of the 349th during that difficult period is something I have wanted to be known for many years, and I was “not down with” myself for not following up to get his story told. Feeling nudged, I found Dr. Michael Blodgett, the historian for the USAF Reserve 349th Air Mobility Wing. Now my dad’s accomplishments are documented in Dr. Blodgett’s story for the Novato Historical Guild’s newsletter, The Historian. (You can read a PDF of the newsletter here. See pp. 5–8.) My hope is Dad’s story will reach people who served in his command.
This last nudge happened at my recent 50th high school reunion. It was a nice evening, but I wondered what I was doing there a lot of the time. At the end of the evening, I approached a friend, and we began to talk about fruit trees for some reason. I have a Santa Rosa plum tree in my backyard, one that has given me 38 years of harvests—and counting. Where he lives there are lemon, plum, apple, and pear trees, and the fruit has just gone to waste year after year. I was so not down with that! So I said I would help find a group to harvest and distribute the fruit this year. When we followed up with emails, he thanked me for the nudge, saying the owners of the property are now setting up a way to harvest and distribute the fruit to the elderly and the needy in their community!
My favorite Japanese proverb is “The day you decide to do it is your lucky day.” I’m so happy that I accepted the nudge and followed through, because each time I could say “That day is today!”
Cher Wooley
I find this “Nudging” inspiring. Barbara Irwin Gildea is a personal friend of mine with which I recently reconnected. We have known each other since 1972-’73. I’m inspired by her tenacity and determination to be “Nudged”! The recognition of her father’s service during the Vietnam War deserves to be told. Too often our father’s struggles & strengths along with all of our VETERANS struggles & strengths go unrecognized. Some gave everything and some are still giving no matter which campaign they served. May God bless all of our VETERANS! Thank you Barbara for being “Nudged”!